Who is this coming out of the wilderness ...

There is something so beautiful about suffering. Something so captivating about a broken heart. There is something so compelling about loss.

I think it's because HE draws us to these places. I think that HE might lure us into the richness of His heart by going through the wilderness. I can't recall the address but a scripture comes to mind- she (us) will make the valley of achor (weeping/ bitterness) a door of hope.
There is something beautiful that happens to the beloved when we can barely even walk on our own. I can almost hear the incredulity in the enemy's voice. "who IS THIS?!!?". He might be asking that because the person he tried to break in the wilderness, the soul he tried to cause
to doubt, the one he tried to tempt, he actually can not recognize that soul anymore. Maybe when we go through a wilderness / heart breaking experience, we have an opportunity to LEAN on HIM, Our Beloved Jesus, maybe in the leaning on/into we let His strength be shown perfect(ly able) to carry us. Maybe we get so close that people can't tell where He ends and we begin!

Because, in brokeness, only in suffering, are we made perfect. Perfect in our understanding of the full nature of the heart of God. Perfect in our faith being put into action in the face of opposition.

All throughout scripture, and in modern film, my heart ( and maybe yours too) is gripped with stories of enduring through hardships- of faith being actually lived out ( not theorized) in the midst of confusion.

I love the overcomers! Because I see Jesus swell with affection for those who prevail.

So I say again, who is this coming out of the wilderness, leaning on her beloved?

Honestly- I hope it's me. I hope it's you.
Oh imagine! Leaning into HIM so close that we begin to even smell like He does!!! Oh the invisible fragrant aroma of HIS preence! The invisible fragrance of brokeness! One thing do I desire, oh is to see you! To walk like you, to talk like you, to sing like you, to love like you, to love like you, to be like you,'to run with you- to be made whole! You will hear us, oh God; you will help us, oh God! Have mercy! Have mercy! We will be healed! Yes God, we will be healed! Yes God-

Oh Kevin Prosch songs are so good...I just couldn't help that outburst!

Because I am witnessing my friends, people I love, leaning on their beloved as they walk through the wilderness. It's transforming them, it's transforming me. What a wonder that this can only happen on earth, in the middle of a shit storm, Jesus is allowing us to know a side of the Father we can only see from here. Praise God for suffering! Praise Him for brokeness! Praise Him for the valley!!! Praise Him for the pain, for the sorrow, for the desert! Hallelujah to the God who leads us through the desert! Who gives us grace to transform the valley of weeping into the doorway of hope!!!

High praise- thanks be to God!!!


...even if it does really really hurt. ( which of course, it does)

He is always moving...

So, this Blog thing is already starting to allow me to vent/process/share.

I am sitting in a cheap Chinese restaurant as I thumb this on my iPhone and I wanted to take a minute to post something that is constantly coming up in my mind. Jesus is always going somewhere. That's what I want to be like too.

What I mean is this- Jesus asked people/ is still asking people to follow Him. We all know this but I think we forget to realize the implication is that He is going somewhere.

This is coming up right now because I've been explaining to someone that I don't have time or desire to pour into relationships with people that aren't going anywhere.
I realize this may sound like I'm a Douche, but think about it... Do you know people who are in the same place they were months/ years ago? Are you in that same place? In some areas of my own life and attitude that describes me. But I don't want it to. I'm trying to live my life as a pilgrimage. I'm doing my best to live out of vision not apathy. Because of this, I have little time for deep friendships with people who aren't going anywhere. To quote Jay-Z "I got no patience and I hate waitin".

I felt kind of bad about this and then it struck me~ God is always moving too. And while He has patience in a way I long to replicate, He called for people to follow Him far more than He called people to sit around with Him. ( this is not meant to say that rest isn't amazing- but we need to rest in/with Him because we get tired on the journey. It also refers to not striving to earn anything from Him)

God came down to Adam to WALK with him in the cool of the day; Gos called Abram and the first thing he had to do was leave his comfortable life and go somewhere. God led Israel out of Egypt and always kept them moving even if it was in circles. It's always the people that want to stop and set up camp.

Moves of God throughout history are just that- moves. Jesus walked by John, Peter and the rest calling them to follow- cause He was going somewhere. The rest happens on the journey.

This doesn't mean we have to quit jobs, move houses, or quit relationships. As always with Him it's about the position and attitude of your heart. Is your heart set on pilgrimage? Or are you content to stay exactly the way you are? Where you are?

People who choose that often have the best excuses. But those set on pilgrimage don't allow excuses to mire them in place. I heard a long time ago- if you're going through he'll, don't stop.
The pilgrim doesn't stop - the victim does.

So- today I am trying to remember that my God is always moving and always calling me to follow.

Psalm 84:5
Blessed is the man whose strength is in you, whose heart is set on pilgrimage...

here we go...

So, this is something I am actually really excited about, and yet oddly enough I wonder about the impact this will have or the desire for people to view yet another blog.

I'm writing this, primarily as an outlet to share my thoughts on worship, the heart of the Father, the great passion of Jesus and my broken love affair with the Godhead.

Brokenness is something that He and I have been talking about for the past 10+ years (that makes me think I should have a better handle on things than I do).

Within these posts I hope that you (the one reading this) are able to understand a little bit more about why I am so desperately in love with the living person of Jesus, the embrace and proximity of His presence/Spirit, and the overwhelming heart of our Father.

So, while I remain unsure of who will end up following my rambling thoughts, I hope that somehow He is smiling at me as we do this together.

more to follow...